How an Apple Charger Almost Crushed My Soul

Adapter or cable? USB-C to Lightening or USB-C to USB-C or UGHHHH

First world problem alert. If you are dealing with some big shit, which given that it is the holiday season you likely are, please by all means scroll to the bottom, slap me a clap, and move on because this is going to ATESOU (annoy the everlovin’ shit outta you).

But, if it might entertain you and/or distract you from your issues for a moment to learn how the world’s most profitable company almost took down a menopausal woman over the course of a few days, by all means tap the brakes, grab some popcorn, and gawk at this wreckage.

For background, I travel back and forth between two homes (see first-world problem above). Which also means that I have duplicates of most things. I’m a bit of a newbie at this, but I learned early on that it was easier to travel light, i.e., keep a supply of meds, clothes, contact lenses, etc., at each home.

Back in the spring, I treated myself to a new iPad. It wasn’t an impulse purchase. I salivated over it for quite a while. I became a bit of a regular at my local Apple store over a three-month period. Then I excitedly placed my order online and waited a solid three months for my order to ship.

My baby was delivered in July.

She was a beauty — swaddled in a sheath of matte film and pristine white packaging. A sight to behold. Perfection and beauty rolled into …well, you know how birthing an Apple product can be. It’s as if Steve Job is looking down from the heavens while a choir of angels in black turtlenecks quietly sing.

Fast forward to present day.

What the FUCK is going on with the universe? My stepson has gone off the rails. My best friend’s dog is in liver failure. Another friend has been hell bent on imploding his life. My husband’s credit card was hi-jacked. Oh wait. By my stepson.

And it’s only Tuesday.

Between reaching out to refill my wine glass and pretending to meditate, I thought, “Where’s my baby?” Maybe I’ll find a show to watch to distract myself. Maybe I’ll play with one of those cool drawing apps — I splurged on the pencil.

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